Putting off old self….

My notes on Character training going on at our place… 

Till 27/11/05

 (I have removed names for privacy/diginity of my children!)

 

Selfishness – Giving.  The opportunity presented itself where the child, after receiving lots of treats and treasures through the day, had to choose between keeping a little tiny thing or giving it to someone who had been given no treats during the day.  They were told that it was between them and God and that they had the choice between keeping it for themselves or giving it with a joyful heart. 

 

 

Selfishness – Serving others – the same child who is dealing with selfishness got up and washed a friend’s dishes, went the extra mile to find out which cupboards things went in so they could all be put away.  Well done!

 

 

Dealing with disappointment – self-control issue.  We can be sad and then we can wallow in our sadness – this is “too sad” and an issue for self-control.  We use the folding of the hands to help bring our emotions under check,  and looking for blessings, while acknowledging the disappointment and sadness.

 

Disappointment in not getting our own way – self control issue.  The whole body is starting to droop – from the knees up to the head!  (It looks very sad but it does nothing to help the heart get to the right place!).  I have started to say “head up” and that is all I have needed to do to encourage handling disappointment with grace.  I was surprised that the child knew what they were doing as I hadn’t discussed it with them at all, just insisted that as they walked away they held their head high.  They knew what I was dealing with!

 

Hitting when things don’t go their way.  I have had to think about this one as to what is the bottom line, what is the heart issue here.  Decided it is patience….(or lack thereof!)

·        complaining – complaining about others

·        not tolerating / accepting bothersome others

·        not waiting / taking turns

·        not responding to difficulty situations with a good attitude

·        and though not relational has also started to flick the hand in front of your face and say “Oh, Oh, I know!” when a group is asked a question.

 

Indicators of impatience …

·        complaining

·        being easily provoked

·        wanting immediate gratification

 

How to teach patience?

            This is where “self control” comes into it. 

Folding the hands,

Walking way,

Seeing your authority as a way of escape. 

            Preciousness of others also comes into it / Honour

                        Seeing value in a person (regardless of how bothersome)