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The other day (it has taken a while to get to blogging about it!) Nomi said she was bored. I listed quite a list of options, sent her down to her room to think about it and then added those fatal words “If you don’t find something to do in 15 minutes I’ll give you a job!”
As soon as they were uttered I turned to Peter and said, “I can’t believe I just said that. I have never said that before and I don’t even believe in doing that!”
I believe that when children say they are bored they need to learn to occupy themselves and to be content with their options and if they can’t do that they need my help to learn to do so. Only when they won’t receive my instruction have I punished them with a task. (and that is for their unteachable heart, not being bored!)
And yet, here I was threatening a chore.
She found something to do but it left me thinking – why did I say those words? Words that clearly I don’t agree with, words which I have refrained from saying for over 10 years of parenting! What was going on?
I was tired. And it was much more convenient to threaten a task than to get up off my seat and do some training. It was a quick fix.
I wonder what else is slipping out, getting under the radar so to speak, because I am tired, or focused on other things. Good time for a check up. Time to check that my words line up with my beliefs and that my actions line up with my words. Consistency in all three areas – my beliefs, my words, my actions is a powerful thing in a parent.